Don't Be a Dumbo! Use the Bumbo!

As I sit here writing, replaying the first few hours of mine and Addy's night together, I have a hard time concentrating. I am not tired. I am not hungry. And it is not due to lack of ideas or motivation. I have not forgotten the feeding schedule (as you can see below) or when bath time is. However, I am greatly troubled by something else. A NOISE. A noise that some of you may know good and well. A noise that may cause restless nights or ruined naps for many. The noise I am talking about is SNORING. And I know what you are thinking. Does Addy snore? No. If she did, that may be some kind of medical mystery or something. But take a look at the picture below and you will get a glimpse of the culprit.

WANTED!
Snoring-at-Large.

Got Milk?

Yes. A dog. That is my female English Bulldog Bella. And yes, she does snore like a 400 pound man whose tongue has fallen dangerously deep into the back of his throat. She even out-snored my male Biggie Smalls who weighed 80 pounds and was twice her size. He recently passed but I can still hear his low grumbling snore. 

R.I.P. Biggie Smalls

Anywho...since Big passed we have given Bella free reign of the house at night rather than sleeping in her kennel. However, she chooses to sleep right outside our door. I wake up more in the night chasing her into the living room than I do with Addy! I digress...

Addy is starting to (in my expert opinion) notice things further away from her. She likes to be sitting up and looking around. However, she was cursed with what I am dubbing "Hall Baby Head Syndrome" (HBHS), in which it takes the child until the age of 14 to grow completely into their head. I had it. My brother had it. And now my daughter has it. Anyways, she loves to sit up and look around, but there is no real comfortable position to hold her in for long periods of time, partly due to "HBHS"(see above) and the strain it puts on your arm, and also due to her "squirminess". So I decided that YES. A 7 week old can, and will, sit in this device they call..."The Bumbo." You can see below how the "HBHS" greatly affects her ability to sit up. That lasted all of 2:37 before she began to enter "beast mode". Needless to say, the Bumbo is back in the closet. Epic Fail.

She looks happy, but you aren't seeing 30 seconds after this photo was taken.

Addy also enjoys being outside. Walking, running, spinning in circles (all in the stroller of course). Maybe I enjoy watching her face when we spin in circles more than she enjoys it, but who says I can't have fun too. Based on all of this I have come up with the equation: 

Addy outside + Moving in any manner = SLEEP!

So, keeping in mind the aforementioned equation...WE WALKED. I am beginning to think that my desire not to hear my child scream may just be the "kick-in-the-pants" I need to get back on the workout wagon. I have walked/ran at least 2 miles every day over the past week. Between Kelly wanting to get back into shape after having the baby, and Addy falling asleep when strollin', I am liable to lose 50 lbs!

I am not upset at the fact that I must walk everyday. It is merely a means to survive. Kelly has the ultimate weapon...THE BOOB! Unfair? Some weaker men may think so. I have simply overcome my inability to lactate. I. Will. Walk.

Well, the walk went well. Addy actually slept through all two miles. So we get inside and I take the appropriately labeled "mini-bottles" of milk and mix them into the big bottle. And we eat. Addy is eating about 6 oz a feeding now, and at about 3 oz in it dawned on me. "She's falling asleep while she eats and I still have to bathe her and get her into her PJ's". Keep in mind the ultimate goal: A no-hassle sleeping baby. So I rethink my strategy. I pull the bottle, get the bath stuff ready, and scrub her down. PJ's are then put on, and we are back on the bottle before she knows what hit her. My logic: If she falls asleep while eating, I can simply place her in her crib and do not have to jostle her to change clothes or wake her with bath time. Genius, I know. So, as she starts to munch on her bottle, her little eyes start to close, and yet another victory is in my grasp. 

SUCCESS!!

Can I sustain my dominance through the wee hours of the morning, or will she counter-attack with first light? We shall see. But wait...I may not be out of the woods yet. There is a faint roar coming from the back room...time to go my friends. "The Beast" has woken from her slumber. Until next time.

Blessings,

-SH